


Standing On Younger Ground

by PleaseDontGetMeRescued



Category: Outer Banks (TV)
Genre: Belligerent Sexual Tension, Blink and you'll miss it suicidal ideation, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Idiots in Love, Idk what this is y'all, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Mutual Pining, Not that much angst don't worry, Recreational Drug Use, Swearing, There is legit BARELY any plot here guys, Underage Drinking, italics abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-16
Updated: 2020-07-14
Packaged: 2021-03-04 07:28:46
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 19,569
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24749887
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PleaseDontGetMeRescued/pseuds/PleaseDontGetMeRescued
Summary: If he really thinks about it, he knows it probably just took missing her for an entire year for him to realize that he never wanted to again.  Miss her, that is.  That shit was brutal.  She’s his best friend and he wants her around all the time.  It’s just that now, he sometimes wishes it was just them.  Like, he’d never want John B and Pope to go away, per se, he just also wants Kie to himself?  Or something?  It’s confusing.
Relationships: JJ/Kiara (Outer Banks)
Comments: 56
Kudos: 253





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! I started writing this like a month ago to combat quarantine boredom and then had to put it on the back burner given the Current State of the World. Nevertheless, this fic is now complete because my body doesn't understand what sleep is. Anywho, I hope you enjoy!!
> 
> Title is from the song We Stayed Up All Night by Tourist.
> 
> Also, please sign [this petition](https://www.change.org/p/andy-beshear-justice-for-breonna-taylor) to demand justice for Breonna Taylor.

The thing about JJ is that he knows, okay? 

He knows that Kiara is about a hundred miles out of his league.He knows that, despite her denials, Kie is still a Kook who lives in a fancy house with parents who love her, eating organic vegetables, or whatever.After graduating she will probably go off to college and change the world. And JJ?JJ will stay in The Cut and work on the docks or at the garage or probably turn into an alcoholic fuck like his dad. 

JJ might love Kie, but they are not the same. 

He knows this.

The other thing about JJ is that no one has ever accused him of being smart.Which is why when a tiny, gangly Kiara Carerra approaches him and John B at the beach the summer before sixth grade, JJ makes a colossal mistake. 

They’re sitting on a log at the Boneyard coughing on cigarettes they’re definitely too young to have their hands on.JJ sucks on his until the filter smolders before unthinkingly chucking the butt into the waves.

Her voice, the first time he ever hears it, seems to come from everywhere all at once. 

“What is your problem?” 

JJ watches as a tiny girl, probably his age, splashes into the chilly water to snatch the cigarette butt out of the surf.She waves the soggy, wet thing in his face, and JJ grimaces as sand flies into his gaping mouth.

“Are you _insane_?”

“Uhhhh,” John B says helpfully, blinking up at her.“No?”

They’re not exactly lady-killers yet.At 11-years-old, JJ and John B are still relying on their “cuteness” to get out of trouble.They have absolutely no game whatsoever, despite what JJ might think, and it clearly shows at their twin gaping expressions when faced with a cute girl.

“You can’t throw trash, especially trash filled with _toxic chemicals_ into the ocean.Are you trying to kill the planet?”JJ and John B share a bewildered glance.“Besides, don’t you know how bad these things are for you?If you’re not going to care about the environment, can’t you at least try to have some self-preservation?”

Her hair is a frizzy mess of curls and she’s got about one million bracelets on.JJ is mesmerized by the absolute complexity in her expression, a confusing mix of bafflement and rage.Something inside of JJ’s check blinks on and stands at attention. “‘Fraid not.”

The girl blinks once, then again, before straightening her spine to lean away from their faces.She drops the cigarette in the bag around her wrist.Upon closer inspection, JJ sees that it’s about half full of other litter.“Well, that’s stupid.You should work on that.”

He doesn’t even consider the words before they fly out of his mouth.He’s known her approximately 30 seconds, doesn’t even know her name, but his curiosity is piqued.Something inside of him says he needs to get her to stay.

“Maybe you should stick around to make sure we do,” JJ says with a wink.It’s awful, ends up being more of an awkward blink, but he’ll be damned if he doesn’t commit to it.

The girl looks back and forth between the two of them.She heaves a great sigh, incredibly put off, before plopping down on the log next to John B.“I’m Kiara,” she says, shoving the toe of her converse into the sand.

“I’m John B,” John B says.“That’s JJ.” 

JJ waves and plasters on his most charming smile.Kiara looks wholly unimpressed. 

She stays put for a while, letting the salty wind toss her loose hair about.The longer she’s there the more rapidly JJ bounces his leg.He doesn’t know why he is suddenly full of restless energy.He tries to anchor himself, pressing his shoes firmly into the sand.It doesn’t help.

The boys learn that Kiara’s parents own The Wreck.They ask if that means she can get them free food.

They learn that she lives on Figure Eight.They ask what a rich girl like her is doing in The Cut.

They learn that she, like them, is learning to surf.They ask her to surf with them that weekend.

And just like that JJ already knows he’s in over his head.

“Well, since you guys are clearly serial litterers, you can help me out,” she blurts a while later, hopping up off the log.“Start picking up trash.We can stop when the bag is full.” 

She’s bossy, JJ thinks, but he kind of likes it.Knows that if he disobeys she just might get riled up.That thought, because he’s a shithead, appeals to him.

While John B immediately gets to work picking up discarded plastic cups and crumpled chip bags, JJ stays put, stretching his legs out in front of him to get more comfortable.

“You coming?”Kiara’s voice is pointed.JJ feels like there’s a string of twinkling Christmas lights going crazy in his brain. 

“Nah, think I’m good here.” 

She doesn’t even say anything, just tips her head to the side minutely and gives him a _look_ , mouth pursed.Immediately, JJ can feel himself caving.He wills himself to hold his ground, making sure this Kook girl can’t push him around, no matter how cute she is.Kiara narrows her eyes and okay, fine, JJ is weak.For some reason he really can’t place, he wants to do whatever this girl says.He hauls himself to his feet with a groan.“Ugh, fine.You do this shit for fun?”

“Not for fun,” Kiara says, handing him her bag with a grin.“For _good_.”JJ rolls his eyes but can’t help but smile a little.She’s an optimist, then.“But I guess saving the planet can be pretty fun too.”

“I already regret asking you to hang out with us,” JJ teases, stooping to pick up a crumpled coffee cup. 

“Yeah,” she says with a smile of her own.“You fucked up.”

But of course, JJ doesn’t actually regret asking her to hang out with them.In fact, as the years go on he often finds himself sending a mental _thank you_ to his past self for the move.Kie is easily one of the best things that happened to him and John B in a long time.Followed closely, of course, by the time about a week after their first meeting, when Kie shows up to the Chateau with a scrawny kid in tow.She introduces him as Pope and says she plucked him from his shift making deliveries with his dad.The boys welcome him with open arms.

And just like that, the world seems alright.Even if the school year is approaching rapidly.Even if JJ goes to bed hungry most nights.Even if his dad is a piece of shit. 

He has _this. A_ perfect summer, every summer, with his 3 best friends. An entire island to explore. 

But it is hard sometimes.

It’s hard when none of the guys can hang out and JJ is reminded that they all have parents who love them.It’s hard when they all get old enough to have summer jobs and see each other less and less.It’s hard when he comes home to an empty fridge and hard fists. 

But he never complains.Because, yeah, life can be pretty shitty but at least he’s got his friends.As they get older they only get closer, spending every spare moment together, fishing off the dock or agonizing over homework at the Chateau’s kitchen table.John B turns 14 first and the gang scrounges up enough money for him to get his boaters license.From then on, there’s a whole new level to their summer freedom.They spend days out on the water just enjoying each other's company or breaking into construction sites to poke around.

Around the same time though, Kie’s parents start putting pressure on her to “act more lady-like.”Naturally, Kie takes to that notion like oil takes to water.She’ll wear the dresses her mom buys for her, sure.But she’ll come home at the end of the day with it mud-stained and her knees scraped.She still shows up to the Chateau with leftovers from the Wreck, but instead of a burger to match theirs, she munches on the salad her mom insisted she takes.In some desperate attempt at parental disobedience, she steals the majority of the boys’ fries.Her hair goes from wild, frizzy curls to sleek spirals.She complains about what a waste of money the expensive conditioners her mom insists on are.JJ can see how desperate she is to just stay the same, just stay a stupid kid without a care in the world.Without her parents’ expectations wearing her down.

The older they get the more often Kie gets dragged away by her parents to attend some Kook event or fancy class.She grumbles about it, for sure, but she also takes to the changes like she’s a frog or salamander or some shit - equally thriving both in water and on land.JJ can feel her drifting away.Or, not really drifting - he knows she’s resistant. It’s like she’s the rope in a game of tug-of-war, Pogues on one end, her parents on the other.It _sucks_.It sucks and it’s hard.

It’s hard when she can’t come hang out with them because she has to go to a _fitting_ , whatever the fuck that is.It’s hard when she shows up one day in eighth grade with a secret smile and a hickey high up on her neck.It’s hard when the guys overhear her dad scolding her for hanging out with “those boys from The Cut.”And it’s especially hard when she disappears for a year and doesn’t come back for anything.Not when Pope falls off the dock and gets a concussion.Not for JJ’s birthday.Not even when Big John goes missing. 

It’s hard when she _does_ come back one day with desperate eyes and pleading words, saying she’s sorry.

It’s hard to forgive her. 

JJ loves very few people on this fucking island, this fucking _planet_ , but Kie is absolutely one of them.When she bailed it left him and the boys aching and confused. Their dynamic faltered without her guiding presence and sarcastic words.The boys fought more during those months than the rest of the time they’d been friends combined. 

The lingering frustration had carried over into JJ’s home life.He’d goad his dad into fights and wear the lessons he never learned on his face and body.And in those months he learned to counteract his father’s harsh shoves with the soft caresses of Touron girls.

And while JJ isn’t Pope, he’s not an idiot either.He does alright in school, okay?He maintains Bs and Cs and shows up to class most of the time.But the year Kie’s gone he just can’t force himself to give too much of a damn.He puts in enough effort to pass and nothing more.

The boys had discovered weed while she’d been gone, and are pleased to learn that she had too.She brings a decently sized blunt the day after her return as a peace offering, as well as full meals from The Wreck.JJ knows he’s being buttered up, but he can’t bring himself to care too much.He missed her.

And listen, that year without her sucked, okay?Like it really, really just fucking blew and he missed her even though he didn’t want too.He doesn’t love very many people and trusts even fewer.Kie is one of them.When she left it hurt worse than his dad’s cigarettes getting extinguished on his arm.But every morning that summer when she shows up at the dock and climbs onboard the HMS Pogue, JJ can’t help the little jolt of happiness that curls within him.So eventually he just... forgives her.Sue him. 

Of course, JJ wonders what happened between her and Sarah Cameron to fuck up what seemed from the outside to be the epitome of Strong Female Friendships.And of course, the boys all ask about it.They’re either curious or nosey depending on who you ask.But JJ doesn’t like the flash of intense sadness that crosses Kie’s face every time the subject is brought up.The look is usually gone in a blink, replaced with angry comparisons between Sarah Cameron and different creatures that are either venomous, disgusting, or both. 

Eventually, they all just stop asking.

Kiara is different in a lot of ways when she comes back.While she had always been passionate about social justice issues, now she seems to seethe at any whiff of income inequality or white privilege or general injustices.JJ is learning a lot from her rant sessions, but it also semi-worried she’ll pop a blood vessel is she keeps getting all worked up like that. 

When she’s not justifiably angry at The State of The World, she’s usually pretty chill.More often than not she’s loose and easy going and dancing and smiling and bugging them to reapply their sunscreen.But sometimes she seems to get lost in thought.She’ll stare into space and only snap out of it when one of the boys pokes her or waves a hand in front of her face. 

She also becomes increasingly tactile.She always wants to be hugging or bumping shoulders.She’ll sit right next to one of them even though there’s plenty of room left on the couch.She’ll pull strands of hair off their clothes or hold eyelashes in from of their faces for them to make a wish.She likes it when they’ll all lined up on the boat or the beach taking in the sun’s rays.She likes it when they all sit on the hammock or the dock with their toes in the water.She lets the boys play with her hair and wrap arms around her shoulder.And when she gets sleepy she’ll rest her head in the crook of JJ’s neck, setting off goosebumps at the feel of her gentle breaths against his skin.

And JJ doesn’t receive a ton of positive physical contact, okay?He hooks up fairly often which is cool, but when you’ve been subject to physical abuse for longer than you can remember, meaningful and sincere acts of physical comfort are an emotional availability that JJ trusts very few people with.So, really, the girls don’t help all that much. 

The Pogues have always been an affectionate bunch, though.The guys are man enough to love on each other with hugs and hair ruffles and cheek kisses without getting weird about it.And JJ loves that.But he’s greedy, okay? 

So he’ll take as much as Kie is willing to give him.He’s excited to have her hugs back in his life. Her smile, her laugh. All of her. But it isn’t long before something in his mind goes _oh shit_ , and shit changes.It’s not like she got hotter while she was gone.Okay, sure, now she’s got, like, _actual_ boobs, but he’s been running around with her in a bathing suit for years now. So it can’t be that. 

If he really thinks about it, he knows it probably just took missing her for an entire year for him to realize that he never wanted to again.Miss her, that is.That shit was brutal.She’s his best friend and he wants her around all the time.It’s just that now, he sometimes wishes it was just them.Like, he’d never want John B and Pope to go _away_ , per se, he just also wants Kie to himself?Or something?It’s confusing.

But, again, JJ might be an idiot, but he knows things.He knows he missed her.He knows he wants to be around her all the time.He knows his chest does a weird cramping thing whenever she pops up. 

And he knows she’s not interested in him because he’s tried, okay?He’s not subtle when he flirts with her.And instead of looking at him the same way he looks at her, she laughs at his cheesy lines and smiles at him and calls him an idiot. 

He doesn’t mind.He loves it when she laughs.

Still, JJ’s just thankful she’s generous with her affection because he's starting to think he's addicted.

JJ leans back against the side of the boat as John B maneuvers them up to the side of the dock.He feels his heart do the all too familiar kick when he sees her coming down the walkway, cooler in hand. 

“Oh, top ‘o the mornin’ to ya,” he says, holding out his hand.

She takes it, and JJ smiles.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Okay, fine, she fucking shivers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Friday, y'all!
> 
> And Happy Juneteenth! Please, if you feel so inclined, sign [this petition](http://chng.it/8x6X5t5Hr4) to abolish prison labor, aka modern American slavery!  
> I'll be including links to a different petition with every chapter upload, so please stay tuned.
> 
> Thanks for reading. I am literally BEGGING you to comment.  
> <3

Despite what the boys sometimes might think, Kiara is _not_ their mother. 

It’s not her job to make sure they show up to school on time.It’s not her job to make sure they eat a vegetable every once in a while.And it’s definitely not her job to clean up after them. 

And while Kiara knows this - knows that the pressure put on women to act maternally since the beginning of time is due to a misogynistic society that allows boys and men to remain immature and complacent _well_ into adulthood - she also doesn’t want the boys to, like, die.

Okay, that’s dramatic.She knows that they’re all mostly self-sufficient people who can take care of themselves.And maybe it’s _because_ they take care of themselves - are _forced_ to take care of themselves in John B and JJ's cases - that she sometimes, maybe, mothers them just a little bit. 

So, if she instinctively spoons out extra servings of veggies whenever they come into The Wreck, or badgers them to reapply sunscreen every few hours, or carries bandaids and antiseptic in her backpack, sue her.She can’t help it.

But she draws the line at doing their chores.She refuses to do their laundry, clean up their messes, or wash their dishes.She’s around food and dirty dishes and sloppy tourists all day every day at work.She is not going to waste her free time scraping the boys’ kitchen disasters into the trash can for them.No way.

So it’s been years and Kiara has never _once_ washed a single dish inside of the Chateau.Not one.

Today, she thinks morosely, that might have to change.

She stares with blurry, sleep-crusted eyes into the empty kitchen cabinet that is supposed to house cups and sighs.The kitchen is a mess.It has been for days.But that’s not her job and she’s not their mother and so she’s gritted her teeth for the last several days every time she’s caught a glance - or a whiff - of the Chateau’s kitchen.Not her problem.

However, what _is_ her problem is the fact that she fell asleep here last night, and now it is morning and she is in desperate need of coffee. 

Kie’s not really a morning person.None of them are.Pope does okay most of the time, but John B is basically useless before he gets at least 2 cups of coffee in him.JJ is like a golden retriever puppy; he naps often, wakes up warm and cuddly and soft before eventually springing into a ball of energy that’s hard to keep up with.Kiara is usually somewhere between John B and Pope - she can get by without her coffee, but it probably won’t be pretty for those involved. 

So here she is, 9 am, slightly hungover, sleep-wrinkled, and suddenly very annoyed that there isn’t a single clean cup in the entire house. 

And she’s not even picky.She’ll drink her coffee out of a wine glass if need be. 

Grumbling, she picks the pot up from the ancient coffee maker and takes a hopeful whiff of the cold brown liquid inside.She’s not sure why she even bothered to check; she’s the first one awake so the coffee is obviously leftover from yesterday morning. The smell is stale and sharp.

She’s got a few options here:

One, she can wash a mug and the coffee pot and that’ll be it. 

But it’s the principle of the thing, dammit.She quickly vetoes that option. 

Two, she can skip coffee altogether. 

Also completely out of the question. 

Third, she could make a trip into town for something fresh at the corner coffee shop owned by Mrs. Garcia.Hell, she’d even take gas station coffee right now. 

She didn’t have the forethought to pull down the blinds last night, so harsh sunlight is blazing through the windows of the Chateau, making her mild headache throb harder.Kie wrinkles her nose, knowing the fasted route to caffeine is to just bite the bullet and make it herself. 

On the street, a motorcycle revs it’s engine loudly, sending another spark of pain lacing through her brain. 

The boys are still asleep.If she’s quick she can make the coffee, chug it down, and return a dirty mug to the sink before the boys ever even realize she broke one of her cardinal rules.She peeks over her shoulder, just to make sure. 

John B’s door is still shut tight.The door to Big John’s room, where JJ has been crashing off and on for the last several months, is cracked open just a hair.If Kie leans around the corner she can make out his blond hair poking out from under the blankets.And when she peaks through the opposite window she can spot Pope passed out on the couch in the screened-in porch, where he always sleeps when he stays over. 

It’s all clear.

She finds some dish soap in the way back corner of the cabinet under the sink and rolls her eyes at the thought of the boys washing their dishes with hand soap instead.She starts the water and is careful not to bang around too much and wake up any of the boys. 

Once she’s got the pot cleaned, as well as a singular mug, she pours water into the chamber before adding a fresh filter and some of the bougie grounds John B prefers.And he calls _her_ a Kook.

She flicks on the coffee maker, sending a prayer of gratitude up to the universe that the stupid thing is battery operated. The power is still out after Hurricane Aggie, after all. She drums her fingers restlessly against the countertop as she waits for the machine to start percolating.She knows a watched pot never boils, or whatever, but she’s still half asleep and can’t bring her brain to work out anything other than _coffee coffee coffee_.

When she’s finally able to pour herself some fresh coffee from the nice, clean pot into her nice, clean mug, she pauses, listening for any sign that the boys might be awake.Hearing nothing, she takes a long, deep, wonderful sip. 

And nearly sprays it across the kitchen when arms wrap around her waist from behind. 

“Did you wash a cup?”

“ _Jesus Christ_ , JJ! Don’t _do_ that!”Kiara presses her tongue to the roof of her slightly burned mouth, pouting.

“Sorry,” JJ mumbles with his forehead pressed into her shoulder blade.Kie can feel the blazing warmth of his bare chest through the fabric of her t-shirt.John B’s t-shirt? Honestly, when she stays the night she usually just throws on whatever she can find to sleep in.It’s really a toss-up as to whose shirt she’s wearing right now.Regardless, the fabric is old and thin from too many washes, and she can practically _feel_ the shape of JJ’s fucking abs against her spine. 

She grunts as JJ hefts more of his weight onto her.“You’re crushing me.”

“No, I’m not,” he mumbles, squeezing her around the waist. 

“You literally are.”

“Share your coffee with me.”

“No.”

“Pleaseeeee?”

“There’s more literally right there.”

“All the cups are dirty.”

“So wash one?”

“Just let me have some of yours.”

“Absolutely not.”

“Kieee,” he groans and it doesn’t sound sexual at all.Nope.Kiara is definitely not blushing.She is 100% unaffected by all things JJ Maybank right now.And always, obviously.She is strong.She is a _rock_.She is - JJ shifts and his lips are basically on her neck now and _fuck_.“Please?” 

Okay, fine, she fucking shivers.

The thing is, Kiara knows how it looks to people.She knows what people think when they see her running around the island with “those three Pogue boys.”She knows what society thinks about girls who are only friends with boys - especially boys as hot as hers are.She’s not blind, okay.Her friends are objectively hot and she’s woman enough to admit it.

But that’s why it’s important that they have boundaries.No Pogue-on-Pogue macking is a rule because she refuses to be that girl who hooks up with all of her guy friends.Not that she would - hook up with all of them, that is.They’re her friends and she loves them but she also knows how disgusting and immature they can be.Kinda ruins the illusion.

So, yes, she loves, them, and they’re all very hot, but it’s platonic.They’re her boys.Her bros.Her friends. 

The problem is that her boys (bros, friends) are clingy.Well, not clingy, per se, but affectionate.They all, herself included, are probably a little bit too co-dependent.Sometimes in the summer, she’ll go days without seeing her parents outside of work.JJ practically lives at the Chateau.They all have spare toothbrushes in John B’s medicine cabinet.Pope’s parents have all of their cell numbers programmed into their phones in case they can’t get a hold of him.They’re known around the island to come in a little four-pack.The boys always accept her hugs and shoulder squeezes and hair pats with gratitude.Pope is also big on hugs and doles them out readily.JJ and John B have been all over each other since they were practically babies, always roughhousing and play fighting and snuggling up together in the hammock.None of them are too man to tell the others they love them and mean it. 

Anyway, all this to say that she’s used to the boys’ affection.She likes it, even.

But sometimes it maybe, sort of, a little bit… affects her.

Well, not usually.Usually, she’s totally fine.A hug is a hug.Whatever.Only _sometimes_ does a warm touch send a shiver down her spine or set off goosebumps across her skin. 

She refuses to think about the fact that it only ever happens when it’s JJ touching her.Nope.Definitely not thinking about it.

And, okay.It’s morning and she just woke up and everything is soft and new in the morning light and she’s on edge.But like a good edge?Like, JJ’s warm weight across her back feels good, okay?Whatever.

She’s still not sharing her coffee with him.

“Sorry,” she says, not sorry at all.“Can’t do it.”She shrugs his arms off from around her waist pulls away from his grasp.She pads over to the refrigerator to see if there’s anything even semi-edible in there, her back to JJ.“Looks like you’re gonna have to wash-“

She’s cut off by a loud slurping from across the room.Letting the refrigerator door slam shut in from of her, Kiara whips her gaze around to see JJ drinking coffee directly from the pot.“Are you kidding me?”

“What,” he asks, genuinely seeming to see no issue with his actions.He instantly looks much perkier at the first taste of caffeine.“This is basically just a big mug, Kie!” 

“Seriously?”

“What’s that,” he calls over his shoulder, already walking away.“Sorry, I think I heard JB calling me, byeeee.”

“Did he just take all the coffee,” Pope asks, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.Kie nods and Pope instantly scrambles after JJ, through John B’s now open door.“ _Wait_!JJ, man, share with me!”

Kiara sighs, pulls in a deep sip from her mug, and trails after them. 


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kiara doesn’t know where to put her hands.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello team!
> 
> I hope everyone is staying safe out there. I've decided to post chapters every 5 days-ish, so chapter 4 should be up on Monday. 
> 
> TW in this chapter for cannon-level descriptions of child abuse.
> 
> This week's petition is for Elijah McClain, who was murdered by Aurora PD in August. Read more about his case [here](https://www.thecut.com/2020/06/the-killing-of-elijah-mcclain-everything-we-know.html), and please, if you feel so inclined, sign [this petition](https://www.change.org/p/adams-county-district-attorney-justice-for-elijah-mcclain-2) demanding justice for his murder.
> 
> Hope you like the chapter! Please leave a review <3

Kiara doesn’t know where to put her hands.

JJ is _clinging_ to her and she doesn’t know where to put her hands.

She’s afraid to put too much pressure on any one spot, less she hurt him more. 

And Kiara’s not blind, okay? 

Sometimes he’d lie and say he fell off his bike while riding drunk.Sometimes he’s lie and say he got into it with some Kook over something stupid.

Sometimes he’d lie and say _it looks worse than it is_. 

This isn’t one of those times. 

Kie doesn’t know if JJ’s newfound emotional availability was a result of pent up stress or physical pain, but she grits her teeth together as she feels him soak through the front of her shirt with a mixture of hot tub water and tears. 

Believe it or not, Kiara has seen JJ cry before.He’s honestly a fairly expressive person.He just often chooses to express himself through sarcasm or jokes.But he never bites his tongue and he never fails to call something out when it was wrong.

And this is very, very wrong. 

She rubs a shaking hand up the length of his back in what she prays is a comforting gesture.“Come on,” she says, close to his ear.“Let’s get you cleaned up.”She holds his elbows to help him step out of the hot tub and onto the ground.He winces at the wry stiffness in his muscles, the throbbing of his blood circulating his system. Kie coos encouragingly and squeezes his arms tighter.Just a little bit tighter. _Here I am_.

Pope wraps a big, moth-bitten towel around JJ’s shoulders and steers him into the Chateau. 

Inside, Pope runs to fetch the first aid kit from under the sink in the bathroom while Kie leads a shaky JJ to the couch to sit down.She squeezes his hand briefly before going to fetch him a glass of cool water.She runs a hand through his crazy hair before pressing the glass to his lips.“Drink this.”

She knows she’s mother-henning him.She can’t help it.She does it for all the boys, even on the most mundane of days, but now, seeing JJ like this, she can’t imagine doing anything other than smothering him with her care. 

JJ’s shaking hands come up to grasp the glass from her.“I got it,” he mutters.Kie still hesitates to let go.While he drinks Kie pulls the towel further up and around his shoulders.She sits down on the coffee table and just.Looks at him. 

Pope comes back in the room and hands JJ a few painkillers.He takes a seat on the table next to Kie and opens up a large tackle box that’s mostly empty. 

Listen, they’re stupid kids who are usually unsupervised.They get hurt a lot.Fish hooks through the finger. Wiping out while surfing andscraping a knee on the itch-inducing rocks at the bottom of the ocean.Getting into it with Kooks who refuse to keep their hands and words to themselves. 

Most of the time Kie just finds the sheer ridiculousness of it all exhausting.But, because they’re her friends and because her friends are idiots, she’s been forced to come up with a semi-comprehensive process for dealing with Stupid Boy Injuries.

Step one: roll eyes.

Step two: rinse wound.

Step three: insult boy.

Step four: disinfect wound.

Step five: scold idiot.

Step six: cover wound with bandaid or gauze if needed.

Step seven: send stupid boy on his merry way. 

It’s easy and Kiara has gotten very, very good at it over the years.

This, though, she doesn’t know how to deal with.She’s never seen JJ this bad.She’s never seen him this emotional, this broken down. 

Pope brings a warm washcloth to JJ’s face and gently starts to wipe away some of the dried blood.Kie pours hydrogen peroxide onto a cotton ball.Pope gently lifts JJ’s chin to get better access, and Kie shudders, looking away. 

“Sorry,” Pope mutters as JJ lets out a hiss through his teeth.“You’re up, Kie.”

Kie sighs and scoots closer to the edge of the table.She takes a deep breath.“Look at me.” 

JJ looks up from his lap and Kie is forced to look directly into his eyes.They’re so fucking blue and so fucking sad and Kie feels her heart physically crack inside her chest.She puts a hand on his shoulder to either steady him or herself and leans in. 

She tries to be gentle, she tries so hard, but the stinging pain of the disinfectant is unavoidable.JJ hisses again and tears spring to Kie’s eyes in a blink.She tries her best to force them back down.She dabs at the wound on his temple gently but still, he grunts.Kiara shushes him softly.“I know.I’m sorry.”She tries to be both quick and gentle.“Almost done.”JJ grits his teeth and grips Kie’s knee with his hot tub-pruned finger.Jesus is it even okay to get chlorine in an open wound? 

Once they’re done with JJ’s face, Kie and Pope move on to his body.The image is just so much to look at.It breaks Kie’s heart.Some of the bruises are older and yellowing, but most carry the inky blues and dark purples of freshness.Pope helps JJ lean back to lie on his back on the couch.Kie helps him lift his feet onto the cushion.JJ winces. 

“What hurts the most?”She wants to run her fingers through his hair.She wants to hug him again.She wants to make him stop hurting. 

“My ribs,” JJ grits, squeezing his eyes shut. 

“Are you having any trouble breathing?”

_Oh god_ , Kie thinks at Pope’s question.She hadn’t even considered that.What if he can’t breathe?What if he-

“No, just aches a lot.” 

Pope runs his long fingers gently against all of JJ’s ribs, feeling for anything that might be obviously wrong.When Pope goes over a particularly tender spot, JJ jerks in pain.Kie rests a hand on his knee, rubbing her thumb back and forth against damp skin. 

“I don’t think any of them are broken,” Pope says, pulling away.“Just badly bruised.”

“Are you sure?Maybe we should take him to the hospital just in case.”She doesn’t mean to second guess Pope but oh god, what if he’s wrong?What if something is seriously wrong? 

Still, even as she makes the suggestion she knows it’ll never happen.For one, JJ is far too proud.Also, he definitely doesn’t have health insurance.And, if social services catch wind of what goes on in the Maybank household they’ll try to take JJ away like they tried to take John B.

_God, John B._ Kiara wonders where he is, wishes he was here.He’d know what to do. 

“Kie-“ Pope begins, sounding hesitant.

“I just mean, something could be wrong that we can’t tell.He could have internal bleeding or a ruptured-“

“Kie,” JJ tries, folding his fingers through hers on his knee.“I’m okay.”She goes to argue some more but he cuts her off.“I promise.” 

The thing about JJ is that he always keeps his promises.Kiara knows this.And right now his eyes are so earnest and so honest and blue and-

“I’ll get you some ice.”

There are only four ice cubes in both of the trays in the freezer.Normally Kiara would scold the boys for failing to fill up the ice trays yet again, but now she can only sigh.She wraps two cubes in one towel and the other two in another.She hopes it’s enough to help. 

Back on the couch, Pope has helped JJ into a semi-reclined position against the arm of the couch.Kie carefully places the makeshift ice packs over what she thinks to be the worst two bruises.JJ flinches at the cold.“Thanks,” he mutters.

“So,” Kie says sitting down on the floor next to the couch.Pope is still sitting on the coffee table and she leans her temple against his knee as he reconsolidates the first aid supplies.Kie reaches for JJ’s hand.He latches on immediately.“What are we gonna do?”

They’ve never asked that question before.They always knew better.But they’ve almost died a few times this week already and Kie will be damned if she loses JJ to the likes of Luke Maybank. 

“The same thing as always,” JJ says, shifting in search of a more comfortable position. 

“No,” Kie says immediately.She knows where this is going.

“We do nothing,” JJ finishes. 

Pope drops his head forward in defeat.“JJ we’re not doing nothing.Not this time. This has gone too far.”Kie nods her head in agreement.JJ’s fingers grip harder around hers. 

Outside the cicadas won’t shut the fuck up.

“Listen, I’ve got this under control.”

“Yeah, it sure seems like it,” Kie quips sharply.She’s tired.She’s tired of JJ being so cavalier about his own wellbeing.She’s tired of seeing the people she loves getting hurt. 

JJ frowns and pulls his hand away from hers.“We’ve got bigger things to worry about you guys.The gold.Barry.And now somehow I have to make back 25k, _Jesus I fucked up_.”

He did.They all know it.JJ shouldn’t have blown the restitution money.He shouldn’t have stolen it in the first place.But no one has ever accused JJ of thinking logically under pressure. 

“JJ, he could kill you next time,” Kiara pleads. 

“He’s not gonna kill me.”

“You don’t know that, dude,” Pope says.

“Your safety isn’t worth the risk.”JJ looks back and forth between Kiara and Pope.Kie once again wishes John B was around. 

Kie watches as JJ pulls his brows together in frustration before definitively schooling his expression into something neutral.“I know,” he says finally, voice calmer than Kie has heard it all night.“You guys might be right.But I’m not saying we never deal with this.Let’s just, find John B and Sarah, deal with this gold shit.”JJ pushes himself up onto unsteady arms and pulls himself off the couch with minimal grunting.The ice packs drop to the floor and JJ shimmieshis way past Pope.“And then later I can figure out how to deal with my dad, okay?”Kie and Pope stare at him in tense silence.“Cool,” JJ says.“I’m going to shower.”

The door to the tiny bathroom closes and locks.The old pipes rattle as the water cuts on, and Kie and Pope don’t talk about the fact that JJ is definitely lying.As long as he can avoid it, he’ll probably never confront his father.

Eventually, Kie gets up and puts the ice packs back in the freezer.She fills up the ice trays and put them in there too.She moves a couple of dirty cups from the counter to the sink and sweeps crumbs into the trash.Behind her, Pope’s phone rings. 

It’s Heyward.Pope needs to be home soon.“You got this?” he says but what he means is _if you need me to stay, I’ll stay_. 

“Yeah,” Kie says, wiping her still shaking palms against her shorts.“I got this.” 

Pope gives her a long hug and takes off for home.Kie busies herself will setting up the pullout and making sure they have enough painkillers for tomorrow.She’s annoyed to find the bottle empty in the first aid kit and makes a mental note to either buy some tomorrow or take some from her house.Instead, she finds a thin joint behind the mess of silverware in the drawer next to the refrigerator and settles onto the pullout cross-legged.She doesn’t know if she should really be letting him mix weed with naproxen, but she knows he’ll ask for it anyway.And really, there isn’t much he could ask of her right now that she wouldn’t give him.

After what Kie knows to be JJ’s longest shower ever, probably, he emerges from the steamy bathroom in a pair of loose basketball shorts and nothing else.He towels off his hair and Kie is too overcome at the sight of his bruises to even appreciate the abs.“Feeling any better?”

“Yeah,” JJ says with a smirk, sounding more like himself.“But you know what I could use right now?”Kiara holds the joint out to him and he grins like a mad man.“You,” he says, gingerly easing himself to sit cross-legged across from her.“Are an absolute angel.”He puts the joint to his lips and Kie lights it for him, leaning in closer to his face.He takes a deep drag before exhaling the smoke in her direction.“Angel,” he says again. 

He passes her the joint and she greedily sucks the smoke down.She needs to feel a little more distant from her own mind right now. 

They don’t talk for minutes, just passing the joint back and forth.It’s almost gone when JJ finally pushes a big exhale out of his lungs and pokes at her leg distractedly. 

“Sorry about earlier,” he says.

Kie shrugs, not sure what she’s supposed to say to that.She wants to tell him not to be sorry.She wants to tell him she cares about him.She wants to tell him she’ll protect him.She wants to tell him that it kills her when he’s in pain. 

Instead, she says, “It’s okay,” and passes the joint back to him.By now their eyes are heavy and glassy.Kiara can feel the weed fogging her brain and making her sleepy.She can also tell that it’s leeched most of the pain from JJ’s sore muscles because he starts to slump in on his ribs whereas before he was careful with the pressure. 

Kiara can’t not look at him.The circles under his eyes and the ragged blond hair falling over his face.She wants to reach out and hold him, feels like maybe if she gets closer he’ll _know_.He’ll know that she’s here for him. 

JJ shifts and Kie sees him wince.“What hurts the most,” she finds herself asking for the second time that night.Her words come out slow and pitched low.JJ flits his gaze up to meet hers, also slow.He points to his head.“Your head hurts?” she asks, worried.She hadn’t even considered the possibility of a concussion. 

He doesn’t say anything for a minute, just shrugs and takes another long drag of the joint. The end gets eaten up and he’s forced to drop it into the solo cup they use as an ashtray.Kiara rubs his shoulders firmly as he wracks with coughs and his chest constricts around his bruised ribs.When the fit is over he has tears in his eyes and his cheeks are bright pink. 

He begins to cry. 

Her heart freezes in her chest as JJ’s crumples and pushes his face into her neck.

“I just don’t know why he hates me so much.”

Kiara curses Luke Maybank in her head, pulling JJ closer.

She wants to tell him he’s wrong.She wants to tell him that of course his dad doesn’t hate him.That he loves him.But it would absolutely be a lie.People who love you don’t hurt you.Don’t bruise you and beat you and manipulate you.But she can’t say that to him, so instead, she runs a careful hand through his hair and murmurs in a smooth, low voice, “He’s an idiot.”He goes to pull away from her as if the words are too much for him to handle, and Kie reaches for him instinctively to keep him near.“Hey, look at me,” she says.She holds his face carefully between her hands and forces him to meet her eye.“Anyone who doesn’t absolutely love you is an idiot.I mean it.”

JJ rips his face from her hands and drops his forehead to rest on her sternum as if he can’t even bear to look at her when she says things like that.Sobs shudder their way through JJ’s body for the second time that night and Kie can do nothing but hold on to him and try to get him to breathe deeply.She rocks him gently back and forth and reminds him that she loves him, that they all love him.That he’s their best friend and they’ll always be there for him and they love him. 

Once his breathing has calmed down he pulls away and wipes his eyes without meeting her gaze.“Sorry,” he says and Kie again wants to tell him he has nothing to be sorry for.None of this is his fault. 

Instead, she says, “maybe you should lie back down.”She eases JJ down onto his back before situating herself right next to him.“How’s that,” she asks, fluffing the pillow beneath his head. 

“Actually, my back hurts more than my front does,” he admits with a wince. 

“Do you need help flipping over?” 

There’s a beat of silence while she waits for his answer.“It’s late.Shouldn’t you be getting home?”

It is late.And she knows her parents won’t be pleased with her, but her phone is across the room and Kiara has no intention of getting up right now.“If you think I’m leaving you tonight you’re absolutely insane.”JJ grins at her boyishly, looking younger somehow with his eyes crinkled from the drugs. “Let me help you flip.”

She moves to sit up and help him but he wraps his fingers around her wrist.“Do you think-“He bites his lip, cutting himself off.The movement breaks the barely-there scab open and Kie reaches out without thinking to pull the lip from his teeth with a gentle finger. 

“Do I think what,” she says, pushing hair back off his face. 

“Do you think I could lie on top of you?”He isn’t looking at her when he asks, and pink rises high on his cheek like he’s ashamed.Kiara is struck, not for the first time with the reminder of what a tactile person JJ can be.He thrives on affectionate human contact.Hugs and hair ruffles and arms thrown around shoulders. 

“Of course,” she says, lying back down on her back.JJ moves sheepishly and stiffly.Kie helps him maneuver over top of her.He slowly presses his full weight down on top of her and it’s almost like the weighted blanket her parents got her for her birthday last year.His weight is warm and reassuring and it instantly calms her frazzled nerves to have him pressed so close. 

He puts his head on her chest, temple to collarbone, and rests his hands down by his side.She can feel his gentle breaths fanning across her skin. 

Kiara doesn’t know where to put her hands.

“Do you want me to hold you or is this good?”She really wants to hold him, but she doesn’t want to make him uncomfortable. 

“Yes please,” he mutters sleepily against her skin.She wraps one arm around his back, pulling him in ever-closer, and cards the other through his damp hair.The gesture seems to soothe him into near-sleep almost instantly.

“Thanks, Kie,” he says on a yawn.His eyes droop closed.

Kie stares up at the ceiling of the Chateau and holds one of her very best friends, beaten and bruised, against her chest.The overhead light is still on above them.Outside the gaudy luau lights are still blinking brightly.Her parents don’t know where she is right now, but none of that matters. 

She doesn’t know what’s going to happen next.She doesn’t know what will happen with the gold, or with the restitution, or with Luke Maybank, but as Kiara clutches JJ to her chest, she knows one thing for sure: she’s not going to let anyone hurt her friends anymore if she can help it. 

“I got you,” she whispers to JJ sleepily before following him into a dreamless rest. 

-

The next afternoon John B storms past her and JJ and Pope without a word, searching for the gun.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> JJ carries his stress in his shoulders.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happppyyy Monday, friends! 
> 
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> 
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> Happy reading!

JJ carries his stress in his shoulders. 

He knows this because he’s all tense and it’s seriously fucking with his paper football skills. 

“Fuck,” he swears, ignoring the scathing look from Mrs. Hernandez at the table next to them.His shot went just wide of the goalposts (Pope’s fingers), just like it had the last 6 times. 

They’re at The Wreck, camped out at a booth in the back, waiting for Kiara to finish her closing shift.And despite Mr. Carrera’s disapproving looks, they won’t leave until Kie does.None of them are too willing to be away from each other for very long right now.

At first, after John B and Sarah, the three of them barely saw each other.Both Kie and Pope’s parents kept them on pretty short leashes, worried about their safety, or that they’d somehow get into more trouble.JJ couldn’t really blame them though.After all, where Pogues go trouble usually follows.So strict house arrest wasn’t really outside of the realm of possibility for parents who actually gave a damn.

For obvious reason, JJ himself still hadn’t returned home.Once the caution tape and police presence cleared out of the Chateau, JJ slipped in through the window of John B’s room and stayed there. 

Despite desperately wanting to see his friends, be near his friends, hug his friends, JJ refused to get between them and their parents.And maybe he was a little bit jealous that they both had parents who actually gave a fuck about them. 

Power had been back up and running across the island for a few days, but his phone had stayed depressingly silent.Countless times he’d start to type a message in the group chat before deleting it.What was one even supposed to say in this situation?

_Hey guys!I know our best friend is lost at sea, probably dead but does anyone wanna hang out and drink with me?_

Not ideal. 

Instead, he stared at John B’s name in the group chat, thinking about how he’d never receive a text from him again.No check-in texts or stupid memes.Everything was going to be different now. 

So he drank all the beer himself, sat outside on the beach or in the hammock, and avoided going out in public.Each night he’d crash out on the hammock or the pull-out, utterly depressed and feeling completely alone.More than once he drank himself to sleep only to wake up in the middle of the night and spill his guts all over the place.It’s about as depressing as it is disgusting.And in the aftermath, heart pounding, mouth dry, he wonders if he’ll survive it.He wonders if he wants to.

A week into his solitude he wakes with a start as the shitty mattress on the pullout shifts under him.It’s the middle of the night but still about a million degrees inside the Chateau. JJ couldn’t tell if he was sweating from the heat or from the shock of being woken up. 

He jerks awake, fists already swinging, but hits empty air.

“Calm down,” Kie’s quiet voice says from somewhere to his right. 

“It’s just us,” adds Pope, to his left. 

They both climb in on either side of him and they lie shoulder to shoulder, gazing up at the dark ceiling.A wave of relief rushes over JJ like nothing he’s ever felt before.

“Sorry we’ve been MIA,” Pope whispers, shifting beside him.“Our parents-“

“I know,” JJ says, cutting him off.“It’s okay.”It’s not, but JJ would never say that out loud.

“We’re here now,” Kie mumbles, wrapping her fingers around his own.Her palm is warm and soft and he grabs on tight.“We’re all together now.”

“Not all of us,” JJ says because he’s a jerk.Because he’s heartbroken and misses John B.Because his friends left him alone for a week and he had never felt so alone in his life. 

Neither Pope nor Kie says anything.They both know he’s right.Instead, Kie shifts onto her side, presses her forehead to his shoulder, and reaches across his waist to hold Pope’s hand. 

That night, squished between his friends on the too-small pull-out, some of the loneliness had begun to ebb away.And when he woke up hours later from visions of John B gasping for breath among furious waves, reaching for him, begging for help, pleading desperately, his friends were there to lull him back to sleep.

The next morning they had decided enough was enough. Kie and Pope agreed that while their parents’ intentions were good, the three of them needed each other in the aftermath of losing John B.Being apart for too long wasn’t an option anymore.

It had taken some groveling, but soon the Carreras and the Heywards had relented, allowing Kie and Pope to stay at the Chateau or disappear with JJ once their shifts were finished and they had checked it. 

Now it’s been a month and JJ knows he was right.Nothing is the same, or would ever be again without John B.JJ ignores the now-familiar ache in his chest that comes around every time he loses yet another person he loves - his mom, his dad, John B - and chooses to focus on the two people he has left. 

JJ makes Ls with his fingers and connects them at the thumb.Across the table, Pope lines up his shot before flicking it across the table.It goes wide - _way_ wide, and ends up narrowly missing Mrs. Hernandez’s enormous hair. 

The boys both wince and quickly look away.Luckily, Mrs. Hernandez doesn’t seem to notice the flying projectile.Unfortunately, the same can’t be said by Mr. Carrera. 

It’s not that he’s always watching JJ and Pope like a _hawk_ or anything.Just, like, some kind of regular bird. 

He approaches the table with a neutral face, but JJ can tell they’re about to get a talking to.“JJ.Pope,” he says, frowning.

“Evening Mr. C,” JJ says at the same time Pope manages a nervous “hi”.

“About time for you boys to be heading home, isn’t it?”

“Yes, sir,” Pope says, nodding his head. 

“We’re just waiting for Kie,” JJ adds.

Mr. Carrera’s mouth twists down a bit and he says “Kiara is closing tonight.”

“We know.”JJ tries to plaster on his best, most charming smile but knows it comes off as cocky instead of polite. 

Mr. Carrera hums before turning and stalking back towards the kitchen.Pope starts bouncing his leg rapidly under the table.JJ’s mostly-full glass of water nearly takes a tumble. 

“Dude,” he says, kicking Pope’s shin.“You’re killing me.” 

“Sorry,” Pope says, immediately switching to tapping his fingers against the tabletop.JJ rolls his eyes. 

Not that JJ can really blame Pope.Since John B and Sarah went missing they’ve all been carrying a lot of stress and anxiety around with them.Pope’s comes out in restless energy, always pacing or bouncing or tapping on something.JJ’s temper has been whittled down to the thinnest it’s ever been.All it takes is one wrong look from a Kook and he’s off like a shot, ready to fight someone.And Kie is quiet.If she isn’t actively working she’s usually staring off into space.She’ll sit for minutes at a time, completely still, eyes glazed over, teeth going to absolute fucking town biting her lip.Which is not at all distracting to JJ.Nope.He’s got bigger issues to worry about. 

Like Barry.

JJ knows it’s only a matter of time before Barry shows up looking for his money.And while his go-to technique for problem-solving (re: ignore his issues until they go away) usually serves him well, it definitely won’t this time. 

Barry might be laying low now, but no one just forgets about 25k.Especially if they’re a drug dealer.

JJ’s obviously returned what he could of his elaborate purchases, but petrol is expensive and there aren’t exactly return policies on express shipping.So he buckles down and works.Helping Pope with his deliveries, picking up shifts at the garage when his dad isn’t there, mowing every Kook lawn in Figure 8, no problem.Believe it or not, JJ is capable of working his ass off when he needs to.And right now he needs to.

Plus, it keeps him busy when Pope and Kie are working. 

“Kiara,” Mr. Carrera calls, and Kie pops her head out of the kitchen door.The tiny smile she forces onto her face in the presence of her parents drops when she listens to her dad’s hushed words.JJ knows they’re talking about him and Pope, but still bristles when Kiara glances their way with a sour look. 

Pope is too busy pushing his straw (paper, obviously) around his water glass to notice her brief glare, but JJ shoots her a half-smile half-wince when she meets his gaze.Kie rolls her eyes but her face softens.She says something to her dad, pats his shoulder, and moves toward the boys.Her dad watches her for a moment before shaking his head and grabbing his jacket off the wooden coatrack in the corner. 

“Here’s your check, Mrs. Hernandez.Let me know whenever you’re ready,” Kie says as she passes the other woman’s table.Then, to them: “Are you two causing trouble over here.”

JJ says no at the same time Pope says sorry.

“There’s only like two other tables left.Y’all’ll help me close up, right?”The boys both nod and Kie smacks Pope’s fingers away from where he’s been chewing on his nails.“That’s disgusting.Stop that.And you,” she says, poking her finger into his sore and scrunched up shoulders.“Need to fucking relax or you’re gonna get stuck like that.”She pushes down on his shoulders so that they’re no longer up near his ears.He hadn’t even realized they were up there. 

When she pulls her hand away her fingers brush the sensitive hairs on the nape of his neck and he shivers.He blames it on the cool rush blowing through the aircon vent. 

While Kie cashes out the last few customers, Pope and JJ make themselves busy loading up trays full of dirty dishes and sweeping the floor.In the kitchen, JJ sprays Pope with the faucet hose while rinsing down dishes.Pope makes a noise akin to an animal screech before squirting a line of dish soap at him.From out front, Kiara shouts “whatever you’re doing in there stop it!” 

While Pope mops the kitchen floor, JJ goes back out to the dining area for one final sweep.He pauses when he catches Kie staring off into space, her hands in the cash register.JJ bumps his hip against hers.“Anybody home?”

Kiara jerks back to awareness.“Don’t talk to me I’m counting,” she says, shuffling through bills. 

“Counting, right,” JJ smirks, pulling at one of her curls.

While she finishes counting the register, JJ busies himself refilling the salt, pepper, and sugar containers.Halfway through, a sharp pain shoots through his trap, and he jerks, spilling sugar across the countertop.“Shit,” he hisses, sweeping the sugar up with his hands and dropping it into the trash. 

Kie makes a note on the register log and loads the cash and receipts into a money bag to store in the safe in the back office.Task complete, she leans back against the counter and eyes him warily.JJ rubs at his sore neck briefly before going back to pouring sugar. 

“You should do some yoga.Maybe it’ll get you to calm the fuck down.” 

“I doubt it,” JJ grumbles, screwing the lid back onto a sugar shaker.His back is to her and he absolutely does not jump when he feels her hands on him. 

Kie runs her hand down the length of his spine.JJ tenses, refusing to let himself shiver again. 

“I’m serious.”She presses her thumb into the huge knot between his neck and his shoulder.Fuck.

_Don’t groan, don’t groan, don’t groan._

He groans.

Kie snorts.“Baby,” she mutters but lightens the pressure.JJ relaxes into the soothing, if not tempting, feel of her hands on him.“You’re gonna end up with, like, shoulder arthritis or something.” 

JJ hisses as she digs into his sore muscles deeper.Her hands are so warm through the fabric of his t-shirt.JJ represses a shudder.He’s pretty sure every hair on his body is standing on end at her touch.He refuses to think about how much he’ll crave her touch when it’s gone.He refuses to think about the softness of her skin when they hug, or the way she always looks like sunshine personified.He can’t think about it because if he thinks about it he’ll go into a downward spiral and that just really can’t happen.Kie is his friend.His best friend.And he’s only got two of those left right now.Despite fucking up being his nature, he refuses to fuck _this_ up.

“Would you still be friends with me if I was a hunchback?”

“Absolutely not,” she says immediately, pulling her hands from his shoulders and moving away.“Sorry, hot friends only.It’s a rule.”

“You think I’m hot?” JJ smirks and Kie rolls her eyes. 

“Fuck off.”She’s laughing.JJ loves that sound.

“It’s okay, Kie.You can admit it.”He tugs on her hand and pulls her closer as if to hug her.She scrunches her nose in mock-protest but allows it.At the last moment, JJ twists and puts her in a headlock.

“Oh my god, let go of me you asshole,” Kie shouts, shoving against him. 

JJ cackles and ruffles her hair. “But a hot asshole, right?”Kie laughs and pinches at the exposed skin of his stomach where his shirt has ridden up.“Come on, say it!It’s okay, you can admit it.”

“Hey!” Pope shouts, stepping out of the kitchen.“Stop having fun without me!” And he puts JJ in a headlock of his own.JJ grunts as the wind is knocked out of him.Pope laughs and JJ is forced to bend at the waist, pushing Kie down even further. 

“You guys, stop,” she huffs, breathless.“I can’t-“ and her legs give out under the weight. 

It’s like dominoes.Once Kie goes down they all collapse into a pile on the floor, all on top of one another and racked with laughter.Kie, at the bottom of the pile, pushes the boys off her with a groan.“You’re both idiots.”

Her face is flushed and her hair is wild and if JJ doesn’t look away right now he might do something he can’t take back. 

“Ooh, suckers,” he says, reaching for the tub of candy he spots below the register.He unscrews the lid and tosses a root beer flavored one to Pope, a pineapple one to Kie, and takes a blue raspberry one for himself. 

No one gets up from the floor as they all unwrap their suckers in silence.The only sound is the fans whirring overhead and the hushed waves from the beach outside.The quiet is a stark contrast to the moment before, and JJ can’t help focus on the fact that something is missing.

Someone is missing.

It’s been a month without John B.Every day JJ hopes he’ll wake up and feel a little bit better, feel the loss of his best friend, his brother, a little bit less.And while some things are good, John B’s death looms over him like a storm cloud he can’t outrun. 

In the silence, Pope has started shaking his foot.Kie is staring into space again.JJ looks between his two remaining friends, knows they’re thinking about the same thing he is, and makes the conscious move to bring his shoulders down from around his ears.He clears his throat.“Ready to go home?”

“Yeah,” Kie says, lifting herself off the floor.“Let me just put this in the safe.Can you guys get the lights?” 

Pope and JJ make one final round through The Wreck, checking that windows and doors are locked and nothing important is left out.When Kie rejoins them she locks the front door and they all climb into the van.JJ turns the key and they’re on their way.

The ride back to the Chateau is quiet.Pope hooks up his phone and plays some soft music over the stereo.Kie lounges in the back.JJ can see her staring at nothing in the rearview mirror.She snaps out of it when they hit the uneven road leading up to the Chateau.“Stop here.I’m gonna grab the mail.”

She hops out of the van and JJ turns to Pope.He puts a hand on the other boy’s bouncing knee, halting his movement.“You’ve gotta relax, man.”

“Yeah,” Pope says, shaking his head as if to clear away the fog.“Yeah, I gotta-“

“Guys?” Her voice is hesitant and immediately puts JJ on edge.He turns in his seat to see her standing outside the van’s sliding door.The dim light inside the van is just enough for JJ to see her wide eyes and shaking hands.“Guys, what the fuck.”

She holds out a single piece of mail.Pope grabs it and swears.

It’s a postcard from the Bahamas.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1) Yes, I know the postcard thing is common. Leave me alone.
> 
> 2) Really was just looking for an excuse to use the word "Y'all'll." 
> 
> 3) The suckers they're eating are [Dum Dums](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dum_Dums_\(lollipop\)), obviously. They're an American staple.
> 
> 4) Please leave a review! I could use some positivity in my life rn lolol


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Well, aren’t you going to kiss me back?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heyo!
> 
> This is technically a few minutes late but I had a very busy day NOT celebrating the 4th of July. Casual, friendly reminder that no one is free until we're all free, and here in America we have a long way to go.
> 
> With that in mind, this week's [petition](https://www.change.org/p/president-donald-trump-or-congress-to-close-down-the-military-base-fort-hood?utm_content=cl_sharecopy_23199787_en-US%3A5&recruiter=985492120&recruited_by_id=7142d530-a9de-11e9-a775-dfab9eb69e6a&utm_source=share_petition&utm_medium=copylink&utm_campaign=psf_combo_share_initial&utm_term=psf_combo_share_abi) is to shut down Fort Hood, an American Army base in Texas that has a history of atrocities such as abuse and sex trafficking. It has most recently come into the news as the base where Army Soldier Vanessa Guillen was stationed. You can learn more about Vanessa Guillen and Fort Hood [here](https://shutdownfh.carrd.co/). Please sign the petition if you feel so inclined.
> 
> Anyway, I hope everyone is staying safe out there! Please enjoy the chapter, including some Kie/Sarah bonding, and leave a review! Love y'all <3

It’s a tradition now. 

Kie missed John B.She really, truly did.He’s her best friend and she loves him so much and she had cried for hours when he had returned from the Bahamas alive and smiling.They all had. 

But sometimes she just needs some quality time with Sarah. 

Like, the boys understand her, sure.They _get_ her, love her, they’re her best friends, whatever.But Sarah has something John B, JJ, and Pope will never have: a mutual understanding of the overwhelming fuckery that is being a teenage girl in the twenty-first century.And while both girls know they c _ould_ talk to the boys about pretty much anything, sometimes they just don’t want to. 

So every once in a while the girls will wait until the boys get distracted by video games or pass out from the exhaustion of a long day doing nothing in the sun, and they’ll slip out of the Chateau without being noticed.They’ll make the drive across town to Sarah’s house as the sun dips low in the sky, painting the water pink and orange.

They pack up a duffle full of pop tarts and skinny pop, comfy blankets, and too many joints rolled by JJ, climb on board the Camerons’ expensive yacht, and make their way out on the water.Not too far, Sarah’s already been lost at sea once, thank you very much, but far enough that it’s quiet and all they can see is stars once the sun sets below the horizon. 

They pull smoke deep into their lungs and crank shitty pop music with no one around to hear them.They eat too many Oreos and pass an enormous recycled glass bottle full of rum and coke back and forth.They dance and sing and talk about one million different things.Things that happened in their lives after their falling out freshman year.What they want to do after high school.The fact that Sarah’s dad and brother are in prison awaiting trial.That sometimes Sarah misses them, even though she knows she shouldn’t.

They talk about the boys. Their boys. John B and JJ and Pope. 

They talk about how glad they are that they’re friends again.How lucky they are to all be alive.And when they run out of things to talk about they drink some more and smoke some more and dance some more, letting their minds wander until new topics come up.Kie is happy to let the only sounds be that of the waves, seagulls calling, and Beyoncé.But tonight it seems that Sarah Cameron has other ideas. 

Apparently, Kie isn’t scream-singing _Love of Top_ enthusiastically enough. 

“Alright,” Sarah says, mind and tongue loose with weed and booze.“Tell me what’s up.”

“What do you mean?” Kie shouts over the loud music.She pulls a thick drag off of the joint before passing it back to Sarah, who cranks down the stereo. 

“You’ve been weird the last few weeks, is all.”

The fact of the matter is that Sarah is right.Ever since she and John B returned, she’s been off.She feels like a bit of bitch for it, but it honestly doesn’t even have anything to do with them. 

It’s about JJ.

Kiara refuses to acknowledge that she’s been ignoring him.Not ignoring.Avoiding him?Maybe?Either way, it’s easier to play dumb.“I don’t know what you mean.”

“Okay, let me rephrase: You and JJ have been weird the last few weeks.Ever since John B and I got home.”Kiara doesn’t say anything.What _can_ she say?Sarah’s not stupid, after all.She has eyes and ears and intuition.So Kie stays silent.“Did something happen between you two while we were gone?”

“No,” Kie says way too fast.Like, sue her, she’s tipsy.And, well, it’s true, isn’t it?Nothing did happen between her and JJ.

No matter how much Kie might have wanted it to.But Sarah doesn’t need to know that. 

Sarah raises a skeptical eyebrow in Kie’s direction and points an unsteady finger at her from where it’s wrapped around their bottle of booze.The liquid sloshes around inside.“You wanna try that again?”

“Really,” Kie says.“Nothing happened.“ 

_But I wanted it to_ , she doesn’t say. _But you were dead and John B was dead and it wasn’t the right time.It’ll never be the right time._ _But I think about something happening between us all the time.But I’m afraid of fucking everything up between us.But I can’t be that girl who has kissed not one, not two, but all three of her best guy friends.But I, but I, but I._

“But it almost did?” Sarah finishes for her.Kie’s mouth twists wordlessly, eyes tracking a shallow wave making its way across the surface of the water.Sarah tries again: “But you wanted it to?” 

Kie meets Sarah’s gaze with wide, hesitant eyes. _Fuck it._ She shrugs.Sarah purses her lips off to the side in contemplation before handing the bottle of rum and coke over silently. 

“It was different when you were gone,” Kiara mutters finally.“I mean, yeah obviously, it was different.But with me and JJ-”Another big swig.“We were all each other had.Me and JJ and Pope.None of us could ever bear to be alone, and whenever Pope was gone it was like…”She thinks about JJ’s hand in hers, the way they never wanted to be too far from one another.They way they crashed on the pullout together more nights than not.The way she’d wake in the morning wrapped up in him, praying he wouldn’t wake up and move away from her.“I don’t know.I just - I don’t know.Things were different.”

“And now?”

Kie contemplates the question.It’s such a simple one, but it seems so complicated.“Is it dumb that I miss him?”She can’t meet Sarah’s eye.How can she stand next to her friend that she thought was dead for a month and claim she misses someone that she sees every day.

“Of course not,” Sarah says softly, reaching for Kie’s hand. 

“Like I obviously missed you guys so much and I wouldn’t trade you being back for anything in the world, but JJ kept me sane those months you were away.We started depending on each other and now there’s like-“She’s just drunk enough that the threads she’s been trying to untangle in her mind for weeks are finally starting to unravel.“This distance between us that wasn’t there before.”She takes another sip before passing the bottle back to Sarah, who follows suit.“And I feel selfish wanting to spend time with him because obviously I want to hang out with you guys too, and Pope, and I want us all to hang out together every day.And, like, we do hang out every day and I love that but sometimes-“

“Sometimes you miss being so close to him,” Sarah finishes for her gently. 

“Yeah,” Kie admits finally, pushing wind-blown hair out of her blurry eyes. 

“Have you considered just telling him that?” 

Kie smiles dejectedly.“No, I don’t think-“

She doesn’t know what she thinks.She doesn’t know what she’s trying to say, but Sarah seems to understand. 

“Well, then you know what the second-best option is?”She pulls a new fat joint out of the pocket of her shorts and holds it out in front of Kiara’s face.“Get super fucked up and deal with it later.”

Kie laughs and pulls a lighter out of her own pocket.This will be their second joint of the night and Kie knows it’s a bad idea but she really doesn’t give a fuck right now.“I love the way you think.”

They turn the music back up.

_

Sarah is throwing up over the side of the boat. 

Kie winces, reaching to pull Sarah’s hair back away from her face.

“Alright,” Kie says, her words slurring together.Above her, the stars are doing blurry pirouettes.“I think we’re done for the night.”

“ _Nooo_ ,” Sarah whines, pushing herself up off her belly onto shaky arms.“I’m good, I’m good!”Her arms give out underneath her and she tips onto the damp boat deck face-first.Both girls dissolve into a fit of giggles and Kie passes Sarah their jug of water. 

“I don’t think you are, dude,” Kie says with a laugh as she watches Sarah messily spill water down her chin.That second blunt was absolutely not a good idea.

“Really!” Sarah jumps up and pulls on Kie’s arms expectantly.“I’ll prove it; let’s dance.”She cranks the music high again and begins to jump around.Kiara sighs good-naturedly and lets herself get pulled to her feet. 

Below them, the moon flickers off the surface of the pitch-black ocean.It makes Kie feel dizzy and alive. 

Sarah and Kie giggle as they dance together.Minutes or hours pass and Kiara is too crossfaded to notice or care.She just wants to hang out with her friend.Her friend who she lost twice and got back both times.She’s lucky, she knows.She’s lucky to have her friends. 

She reminds herself of that fact when she is forced to hold back Sarah’s hair as she pukes over the side of the boat once again.

“I’ll radio the boys to come get us,” Kie slurs once Sarah’s settled back down.Sarah whines a little but nods, wiping her nose off on a towel.

Pope answers the radio.He pokes gentle fun at Kie’s slurred words before promising to be there soon.The static of the radio goes silent and Kie changes the music to something a bit quieter.

She lies down next to Sarah on the deck of the boat, shoulder to shoulder.She stares up at the night sky and listens to her friend humming along with the stereo under her breath. The world goes calm and filmy. 

Soon the sound of an approaching motor breaks the peace. The horn on the HMS Pogue honks once, twice, and Sarah cheers, leaping to her feet. 

Kie stays where she is.The stars are too pretty to look away just yet, so she doesn’t.

She keeps looking up, even when she hears some precarious splashing, Sarah’s elated cackling, and John B’s exasperated grumble of “ _Jesus_ , Sarah.” 

The boat gently rocks underneath her and suddenly JJ is there.He lies down on his back next to her, feet facing the opposite direction and lining their heads up next to each other.His soft hair tickles her ear and he makes himself comfortable. 

“ _You’re here_ ,” Kie coos with far too much fondness.It’s barely been a few hours since they saw each other last.The voice in her head begs her to get ahold of herself.

She can feel an enormous grin splitting her face open, but can’t seem to maneuver back to neutral.She doesn’t think it matters all that much though because JJ is grinning too. 

“Careful.Don’t act too excited or I’ll get my hopes up.”His voice is bright and deep, like he’s excited to see her too but doesn’t want to be too obvious.Kie is too focused on the way his pretty mouth shapes the words to properly grasp his meaning. 

“ _Huh?_ ” Her brain is being so lazy right now.JJ laughs at her and Kie can’t help but smile harder.She loves that sound.

“Feelin’ good?” he asks fondly. 

_Look away,_ she tells herself. _Look away, look away._

She stays where she is. 

JJ is too pretty to look away just yet.So she doesn’t.

She nods loosely in a delayed response to his question.She’s so high.She feels like her eye are closed even though they’re not.She knows because she’s looking right at JJ.And JJ is looking back at her. 

“Hi.”

“Hi.”She loves that smile.“Did you guys have fun?” 

Kie nods again.“Yeah.”The words slip out before she can even clock them as a bad idea.“But I missed you.”The world still moves in pretty, cloudy spirals, but JJ freezes as still as a statue.“You _guys_ , I mean,” she corrects in a hurry.“All of you.”

JJ’s smile fades a little but his eyes stay earnest.“Right, of course.”

Kie hears the engine on the HMS Pogue kick on again and she blinks, pulling her eyes away from JJ’s and back up to the stars.“Where’re they going?”Her voice suddenly sounds small.A chilly breeze swoops over the water and sends her loose hair up into the air. 

“Pope is gonna steer the Pogue back.John B is gonna make sure Sarah doesn’t fall overboard, and you and me will take back this beauty,” he says, patting the deck of the Camerons’ very expensive yacht with a smirk. 

She doesn’t know what it says about her that her first thought is an elated _we’re alone_. 

She’s definitely not in the right mindset to follow that train of thought, so instead, she teases him.Teasing is always safe.“Dream come true for you then,” Kie says, knowing how much JJ has always wanted to be behind the wheel of a boat like this one. 

JJ laughs, a small little thing that Kie knows probably lights up his whole face.She _has_ to see it.She turns her head back towards him.Their noses nearly brush.

JJ’s face falls to something completely serious - guarded and maybe a little hopeful.“You could say that.” 

Kie doesn’t know if they’re still talking about the yacht. 

They stare at each other for blinks and blinks.Kie admires the way his long golden lashes bat against his cheeks.His eyes are honest-to-god sparkling, Kie thinks.But that might be the weed.Either way, Kie is mesmerized.She needs to snap out of it.She needs to look away.She needs _him_ to look away. 

“Stop staring at me,” she whispers. 

It’s a request, not a command, but JJ’s face still automatically snaps up towards the sky, looking away. 

“Sorry,” he mutters, pressing his lips together. 

“I just need to-“She doesn’t know why she’s talking.She doesn’t know what she’s trying to say. _Oh god,_ she thinks.This is JJ.She’s here with JJ. 

_We’re alone,_ she thinks again.

And really, she doesn’t know what she wants to do with that information.The idea of the two of them being alone, for the first time in what seems like forever, sends warmth spiraling through her.

“I didn’t mean ‘you guys’,” she says finally.JJ blinks. _What?_ “I didn’t miss all of you guys.”She breathes.She leans up on her elbow.She kisses his cheek. 

Her mouth tastes like rum and too sweet coke.Her tongue feels heavy and thick, drier than the desert.She probably lingers a touch too long, feeling the warm smoothness of his cheek under her lips.But when all is said and done and she lies back down, placing her gaze firmly and safely on the stars above, she still manages to say what she didn’t even know she had been trying to say.“I just missed you.”

A moment of calm silence passes between them.She hears JJ breathing through his nose, slow and steady.

Kiara can not, will not, look at him, but she feels his eyes on her face like a caress.After a few too many beats the tension gets to be too much, and Kiara opens her mouth again. 

“Well, aren’t you going to kiss me back?” 

Kie feels JJ’s warm breath on her skin as he chuckles, pushing his face closer to hers and laying the warm skin of his lips across her cheek in a long, sweet kiss.“I missed you too,” he whispers before climbing to his feet and turning over the motor.

The world around Kiara wavers as the boat shifts against the water.

Kie doesn’t know if the butterflies in her stomach are from the alcohol or the company. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact: this is the first chapter I wrote!
> 
> Please wear a mask, wash your hands, and leave a review!!


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Speak now,” he says, and it feels like a dare.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey there friends!! Thank you to everyone who has left a comment!! They truly, truly make my heart sing prettier than Julia Andrews. 
> 
> We're nearing the end here! Only one chapter to go after this...I may or may not have some thoughts about a potential sequel...if there's interest? Idk, man. Writing this was fun and therapeutic so we'll see.
> 
> This week we're doing two petitions. If you haven't heard, due to COVID, many universities are switching to online-only classes this fall, prompting ICE to demand all international students leave the country. This is absolutely absurd and disgusting and I could go on, and on, but you can read more about it [here](http://chng.it/ZNFHsw5F4K), as well as sign the petition if you'd like.
> 
> The second petition is to abolish ICE altogether, which you can find [here](http://chng.it/JpqnDwRHhQ).
> 
> Anywho, sorry for the long note. Enjoy the chapterrrr :)

Kie wakes up to the gentle rocking of the HMS Pogue and immediately knows she’s made a huge mistake. 

It’s hot.Too hot. 

She had worked late the night before, staying up even later still to finish a book she just couldn’t put down.In hindsight, it hadn’t been her best move, but damn had the ending been satisfying. 

Inevitably, she had allowed the warm rays of the early morning sun to gently lull her to sleep soon after she’d climbed on board with the help of JJ’s steady hand. 

Now, though, she’s regretting it.

When her mind logs back online she immediately shields her eyes against the harsh sun.It must be at least mid-day, she realizes.Her shoulders hurt a little bit when she shrugs them, and she groans, knowing she’s destined for the peeling skin of a wicked sunburn. 

The world rocks precariously as she hears JJ push Pope off the bow of the boat.There’s a yelp, a splash, and a chorus of raucous laughter, followed by another yelp as Sarah pushes John B in too.She and JJ jump in after and Kiara is left feeling a little bit woozy with the waves. 

She sits up with a grunt and squeezes her eyes shut tight when the inevitable headache makes itself known.It’s never a good idea to fall asleep in the sun for too long.She reaches for a random sweating bottle of water stashed in the shade under the seat and takes desperate gulps.She also snags one of the boys’ hats from the floor, placing it over her hair to block at least some of the sun from her face. 

“Morning, sleeping beauty,” JJ calls cheekily as he climbs up the ladder at the back of the boat.She squints at him sleepily.The bright sunlight combined with the reflection of the sparkling water makes JJ’s eyes look insanely blue. 

“Careful,” he says, poking her in the cheek with a dripping finger.Kie can feel the way her face is all scrunched up to combat the sun.“Wouldn’t want your face to get stuck that way.”

Kie rolls her eyes and pushes his hand away from her face with a groggy laugh.“Yeah,” she says without thought.“What would you stare at all day then?” 

A heartbeat, and then -

“Still you, probably.”

JJ’s grin falls into something more careful and teasing. 

Kie does not blush.The heat in her cheeks is absolutely from the sunburn, not from JJ mentioning the thing they never mention.

Because nobody _ever_ mentions it - the way that JJ can’t go too long with setting his gaze on her. 

No one brings up the way Kie is almost always staring back, either.

This is just what they do.In between all the bickering and bantering, there is a build-up of too sweet touches and lingering stares between them that everyone notices but never names.They flirt shamelessly every day, but nothing ever comes of it.They gravitate towards each other more often than not.JJ will randomly throw an arm around her shoulder and pull her close, or rest his hand on the small of her back to let her walk in front of him.Kie will run her fingers through JJ’s hair when it gets unruly, brush sand from his skin when they're at the beach.More and more often she finds herself reaching out for his hand whenever he gets too close, but somehow not close enough.She always wants him closer.

But they never talk about it.It’s an unspoken agreement.

Sometimes Kiara thinks the tension might just kill her.It builds and builds in her stomach and in her chest and the only way to break it is with a pin to a balloon, aka banter. 

“Even with a fucked up face?”

“Who has a fucked up face?” Pope asks, climbing up the ladder.

“You,” JJ says, quick as a whip.Pope sticks his tongue out at him and wraps a towel around his shoulders. 

Kie takes a moment to thank the universe for Pope Heyward.

“Kie,” Sarah calls from in the water. “You’re awake!”

“Yeah,” she says, moving to stand at the bow of the boat. “Sorry I knocked out on y’all.”Sarah and John B are treading water beside the boat.Well, John B is treading water.Sarah is koala-ing him like a backpack, arms wrapped securely around his neck. 

“Late night?” John B asks, squinting up at her.Kie nods.“Gotta get that beauty sleep in.”

Kie makes a noise in the back of her throat, mock-offended, at the same time Sarah says, “excuse you,” and disentangles herself.

"Rude," Kie says, flipping him off?

“What me to splash him?” Sarah asks. 

The answer is obviously yes and Sarah gets to work trying to shove John B’s head underwater.John B shouts while Kiara cheers on Sarah, demanding no mercy.

“Alright, alright,” JJ chimes, pushing his way back into Kie’s space.“Sarah give the man a break.Now what seems to be the problem here, kids,” he says, pretending to be the peacekeeper.The notion would be pretty laughable if Kiara wasn’t distracted by the way she can feel the heat radiating off of his tan skin.He’s standing so close.Goosebumps break out across Kie’s arms and stomach.She tells herself it’s from a sudden gust of chilly sea air. 

“John B told Kiara she needs more beauty sleep,” Sarah blurts before swallowing bubbles as the boy in question playfully pushing her underwater as revenge.

JJ laughs.“Awe come on John B, quit telling lies.Look at this face,” JJ says, putting his hands on either side of Kie’s face and pushing her cheeks up like a chipmunk.“Face of an angel, right there.”Kiara laughs and swats his hands away.Quick as lighting JJ grabs her hand and gives it a squeeze before letting go. 

“Alright, oh my god, I’m sorry,” John B laughs, still fighting off a splashing Sarah.“I’m sorry!”The splashing ceases and John B grips onto the side of the boat to catch his breath.“Jesus.” 

Kiara’s chuckle turns into a disgusted scoff when JJ shakes his hair out like a dog, spraying chilly water all over her.“Stop, you idiot!You’re getting me all wet!”

“Sorry,” JJ says, not sorry at all.He puts a few feet of distance between them, picking up a can of beer and guzzling it down. “I mean, you’re gonna get in the water anyway.”When Kie doesn’t immediately agree JJ blinks.“Right?”

“Well, yeah. But not right away.”

JJ shares a look with Pope, grinning like a mad man who is up to absolutely no good.The look shoots straight down Kiara’s spine when he pins his sights on her, but the bright spot of heat is quickly doused by dread as JJ approaches her, arms outstretched. 

“No,” Kie says firmly.

“Kie,” JJ sings, getting closer.

“No.”His fingers meet her hip and she shudders - imperceptibly, she hopes.“JJ, I’m serious.”He wraps his strong arms around her and Kiara shoves down the urge to lean into the embrace in exchange for playing a game they both know she’s about to lose.“Do _not_.I mean it.Do _not_ push me in.” 

He squeezes her tighter and puts her chin on her shoulder with a laugh.“Fine.I promise.”

Kie relaxes into his hold briefly before realizing her mistake.This time, when she says his name it comes out as a shriek as he twists them around and falls backward into the water with her in his arms the entire time. 

Water goes up her nose but she’s used to the feeling after so many years on the ocean.Bubbles erupt around them and tickle at her skin as they resurface, sputtering and laughing.“You’re such a jerk,” she says.There’s no heat to it - it’s hard to be mad when JJ is grinning at her so brightly. 

“Sorry,” he says again, releasing her.

“No you’re not,” Kie quips fondly.Sarah and John B laugh as they’re all overcome by a huge wave when Pope cannonballs into the water.

“No,” JJ says.“I’m not.”Kiara splashes him with water before wrapping her arms around his neck and clinging on.She’s too lazy to keep herself afloat, so she lets him do all the work.The sun is high in the sky and Kie can’t help but smile. 

Eventually they haul themselves out of the water to hydrate and eat the sandwiches Kie had packed for lunch.She lays the soaked baseball hat out to dry and shakes out her hair, dousing JJ in the spray as payback for earlier.They sprawl across the too-warm seats and chat about nothing and everything.When the trash has all been collected in a biodegradable trash bag Kie brought, John B kicks the motor on and steers them in a bit closer to shore.The sky is turning a bit gray, and after everything, he and Sarah are always hesitant to be out on the water when it’s raining. 

The weather holds out, and eventually, John B cuts the engine again.They lounge around in their new spot, letting the sun bake them.Kie’s headache is starting to come back, and she puts on the same baseball hat from before and Pope’s sunglasses to cut the brightness.When the other four slip back into the water with goggles and snorkels to look for cool fish, Kie moves to sit off the back of the boat with her toes in the water. 

She watches with an aching fondness as JJ, John B, Pope, and Sarah paddle awkwardly on the water, faces below the surface.Despite her headache, she feels an overwhelming love for her friends and their slow, lazy days together. 

JJ pops his head above water some hundred feet away and waves.Kiara smiles and waves back as he starts to make his way back towards the boat, grinning.He climbs the ladder and pulls a half-smoked joint and a lighter from the dry compartment next to the steering console. 

“How’s your head,” he asks, squishing himself in next to her and dripping water onto her legs, , despite there being plenty of room on the other side of the motor.

“Mostly better,” she tells him.The sun is starting to get lower and less intense, so she tosses Pope’s sunglasses onto the bench seat and flips the hat around so it’s backward. 

JJ’s hair is a mess and Kiara has to resist the urge to push it away from his eyes.She watches as he wraps his lips around the joint and lights up.Watches as he pulls smoke deep into his lungs and filters it out through his nose.Watches as he shifts, glancing her way, and catches her already staring. 

His eyes are so fucking blue.

He grins, holding the joint out to her expectantly.Kie shakes her head no.She needs to get a hold of herself.She can’t keep doing this.She needs to keep a clear mind, focus on keeping this thing between them, whatever the fuck it is, from escalating. 

Because of their agreement. 

The one they don’t talk about.

JJ shrugs as if to say _suit yourself_ , before breathing in another long pull.A way out on the water, Sarah pops her head above the surface.She waves before dipping back down. 

They wait in comfortable silence as JJ smokes and Kie watches the late-afternoon sun cast sparkles across the gentle ocean waves.The day has gotten away from them, as it so often does lately.Kie feels sleepy from a combination of her late night and a long day under the bright sun.JJ is next to her, her friends together and having fun, and she’s tired.

She loops her arm through JJ’s and lays her head on his shoulder.Even damp, his skin is warm and it makes her eyes droop.JJ switches the joint to his other hand and links his fingers through hers.Neither of them says anything when he runs his thumb back and forth against her wrist. 

Kie tilts her head up and watches his long lashes bat against his cheek as he blinks.She looks at the dimple that is always just barely peeking out at her.She looks at one of her very favorite people on the planet and thinks about how maybe, just maybe, she’s tired of their game. She thinks about how much she wants him. 

“JJ,” she says, voice barely above a whisper.He hums in acknowledgment but doesn’t look at her.Kie pulls her face away from his and looks at him dead on. 

“What’s up,” he says, finally meets her gaze.His smile immediately sends a torrential outpouring of butterflies loose in her stomach. 

“What are we doing?”

His smile fades to something smaller and more reserved.He blinks, looks down at where their hands are clasped, and shakes his head with a low, self-deprecating huff of laughter. 

Kiara doesn’t know what she expects him to say.She doesn’t know what she _wants_ him to say.She only knows that something is about to happen and she’s determined to put the ball firmly in JJ’s court. 

“Smoking,” he says simply with a shrug. 

Kie’s chest does a weird shuttering thing like a car running out of gas. _Oh_.

_Maybe it's just me_ , she thinks impossibly. 

There's something there. She knows it. Everyone probably knows it. But when she basically straight-up asks...

She wonders what, exactly, it is that he wants from her. Some days she thinks it's everything, and others she thinks it's nothing. She needs to know. She _has_ to. She - 

JJ holds the nearly-finished joint out to her and raises his eyebrow in question.“Want the last hit?”His smile is flirty and sharp and something she’s seen him use on Touron girls one million times.His eyes are narrow with the effect of the drugs.The bridge of his nose is a light shade a pink from the sun.His expression is blissed out, and he’s so gorgeous that it sets her fucking teeth on edge. 

“Speak now,” he says, and it feels like a dare.Kie’s mind races as she combs through the established rules of their unspoken agreement, searching for any indication of what comes next. 

JJ shrugs and brings the end of the joint back to his mouth. 

His mouth. 

_Fuck_.

Right then, Kie decides she’s done playing this game.She’s sober and he’s high and Kie is extremely aware of the fact that while they might be playing the same game, right now he’s in a whole different league. 

That is to say, she’s way too sober for this shit.

So before JJ has a chance to exhale his last bit of smoke, Kie grips his face firmly between her fingers, forces him to look at her, and presses her lips to his. 

Kiara doesn’t even want to ignore the way JJ moans as she sucks the smoke straight out of his mouth. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :) :) :) :) :) :) :) 
> 
> *Space Jam voice* Y'all ready for this?
> 
> Please feel free to yell at me in the comments. WHAT DO YOU THINK WILL HAPPEN NEXT?? I WANNA KNOW YOUR THOUGHTSSS!!
> 
> Stay safe out there, kids!


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He wanted her to stick around forever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is it, y'all. The final chapter! I hope it's everything y'all were hoping for! Personally, I'm pretty fond of it. 
> 
> I really can't thank you guys enough for sticking around with me. This fic was such a joy to write. I'm kind of sad it's over.
> 
> And also, thanks to everyone who has been signing petitions. I know the world seems pretty terrible right now, but every signature counts and every voice matters when pursuing justice. That being said, today's [petition](http://chng.it/TgSSKgJL9R) is to pass the Anti-Lynching Bill, which would make lynching a federal hate crime. Anti-lynching legislation was first introduced to congress in 1922 and has NEVER passed. It's been almost 100 years, y'all. Please sign if you feel so inclined.
> 
> Okee on to the final chapter!! Please, please, please enjoy <3

JJ loves John B like a brother. 

Over the years JJ's taken the fall for his shit about a hundred times, held a gun to Topper’s head to defend him, and absolutely lost his shit when he thought he’d died.

But JJ has never been so close to murdering his best friend as he is when he pops his head out of the water approximately five seconds after Kie’s lips touch his for the first time ever.

JJ know what this was. They’d been playing this game for so long. For years, probably. But this moment, their legs hanging off the back of the Pogue and into the sparkling blue ocean, shoulders pressed together, sun beating down from between the gray clouds - it felt like something important. Like a turning point. Something they’d never be able to come back from.

Or, at least, JJ hoped they’d never be able to come back from. 

Kiara breathes in, stealing the smoke straight from his lungs and into hers.JJ lets it go, exhales as she inhales, her petal-soft lips against his.

It hits him then that they’re both stupid.Or stubborn or fucked up or afraid.This was always going to happen.One of them would snap and make a move and the step immediately following it would change their relationship forever.

JJ knew he had two options here.One, let Kie steal the breath from his lungs and let the moment pass.Make a flirty joke the way he always does and let nothing change between them.

Or.

Or this could be it.Everything could change.He can change it right now.Their relationship could be different forever and he -

He wants her. Wants to hold her close and kiss her lips and play with her hair and let her play with his in return. He wants her to sit in his lap and snuggle in close and whisper in his ear, and hold his hand and be by his side and and and and.

One million and one ways for them to be together rush through his mind at the very first press of her lips against his and he know, he _knows_ , that there’s no going back for him.

He’s been weak for her from the very first moment all those years ago when she accused him of having no self-preservation.From that very moment, he had been hooked on her attention, could never get enough of it.Wanted to be around her all the time.Wanted to make her smile and laugh and stick around.

He wanted her to stick around forever. 

And suddenly, now, after all these years with her as his friend, that wasn’t enough.All it took was one kiss - not even a kiss.One touch and he knew he could never go back. 

No. 

He groans, leaning in to press his lips more firmly against her own. He shifts to pull her closer, fingers against her soft cheek to deepen the kiss, to make her his.

And then John B pops his fucking head out of the water.

JJ jumps.Kiara makes a tiny, shocked noise as their lips disconnect.JJ jerks away from her in the blink of an eye, pushing her shoulders away from him to put as much space between them as possible.His heart beats out of synch when he clocks the shuddered look on Kiara’s face, cheeks red and eyes instantly guarded.

_Shit_.

_Fuck, fuck, fuck._

John B, seemingly totally oblivious to the moment he just nuked, spits a gulp of water in JJ’s direction and says, “would one of you mind tossing me a beer?Gotta hydrate, ya know?”

“Yeah,” Kie says, clearing her throat.“I’ll get it.”She tucks a piece of curly hair behind her ear and climbs to her feet, avoiding looking at JJ.

He reaches to hold her back, pull her in, _something_ but she easily steps out of his reach and moves towards the cooler.

“Looks like it’s getting pretty dark,” John B comments casually, eyeing the sky.

JJ grits his teeth and forces himself to breathe.To not murder his best friend.“I hate you so fucking much right now,” JJ hisses under his breath, climbing to his feet.

“What’d I do?”

“Here,” Kie says, tossing him a beer from the cooler underhand.John B makes no move to catch it and they all watch as the can dips below the water before bobbing back to the surface.John B cracks it open and takes several long pulls as Kie says “We should go in soon.”She eyes the rapidly-darkening clouds and JJ moves closer, desperate to make contact.

“Probably,” John B agrees, climbing the ladder.“Yo, Sarah, Pope!We’re heading in.”

“Kie,” JJ murmurs under his breath, reaching to brush her arm.Above them, the first crack of lightning breaks across the sky.

“Hurry up you two,” Kie calls loudly, pulling away from him.“We’re gonna get struck by lightning.”

Pope and Sarah climb onto the HMS Pogue as Pope spouts statistics about lightning strikes.John B slips a sun-faded t-shirt over his still wet torso and steals his hat off of Kie’s head.Kie throws a towel in Pope’s direction and hands another to Sarah.The Pogue takes a particularly hard lurch as the ocean begins to churn around them.

John B turns over the engine and puts the boat into motion.“Should probably all sit down, guys.It’s getting pretty choppy.”

Sarah drops into the front seat as John B takes the helm.Pope perches on the bench seat at the back of the boat.JJ blinks at Kiara, waits for her to make her move.She drops down to sit at Sarah’s feet, who immediately begins wrapping Kiara’s curls around her pinky.Dejectedly, JJ takes his place next to Pope. 

The engine of the Pogue roars underneath them as John B quickly but carefully steers them back towards shore.Up ahead, JJ can see Kie resting her head back against Sarah’s knees, staring off into nothing. 

The look on her face says it all. 

He really fucked up.

-

By the time they make it back to the dock, the sky has turned a worrying shade of black. Flashes of lightning spike through the bubbling clouds as if the Pogues themselves have angered the gods. 

Immediately upon making contact with the dock, the sky cracks wide open and fat, warm raindrops pour down around them. 

Sarah shrieks out a peal of giddy laughter, grabbing up towels and miscellaneous clothing items before launching herself onto the dock and up towards the house.JJ curses, reaching for the ropes to tie onto the dock as John B pulls the keys from the ignition and Pope latches onto the cooler.An alarming rumble of thunder seems to shake the earth and the waves lapping against the side of the Pogue are rough and choppy.Pope shrieks as another crack of lightning lights the sky and he and John B are quick to chase after Sarah towards safety. 

“Wait, _guys_.Help me! Fuck,” Kie shouts, reaching for discarded bottles and trash.She gathers what she can and throws it into the garbage bag with their trash from lunch.JJ finishes tying off the boat and reaches for her hand to help her off the dangerously rocking boat.Even though the summer rain is warm, Kie’s fingers are freezing and send a shock of goosebumps across his arms.

“Come on,” he shouts, unsure if she can even hear him over the raging of the storm.He takes off ahead of her, trusting that she’s only just behind him.They’re almost to the grass when he hears a yelp, immediately followed by the sounds of something hitting the dock. 

“Fuck, Kie,” he says, rushing to pull her up off the slick dock where she fell.Both of her knees are scraped and beginning to bleed.The trash she had carefully collected spills off the edge of the dock and into the water.

“I’m fine,” she says, ripping her arm out of his grip.JJ clenches his jaw tight as Kie swings her legs over the edge of the dock and pushing herself into the shallow water.She snatches at the trash lurking on and under the rapidly crashing waves. 

The storm is whipping harshly around them, and Kie’s hair keeps getting glued to her face.An empty beer can gets picked up in the wind and skids across the surface of the water.Kie stumbles through choppy waves to get it.“Kie!” JJ shouts over the storm. The Pogue is slamming roughly against the bumpers.Kie trips over the rising water that reached her knees, and the trash in her hands once again goes scattering across the water.“Jesus.”JJ grunts, climbing down from the dock and into the waves after her.“Kie, _just leave it_ ” he calls, once again reaching for her elbow.

“ _No_ ,” she cries, wrenching away from him with wide, unreadable eyes.Something inexplicable inside of JJ throbs in a way that is either pain or relief.Finally, _finally_ she is looking at him.Finally he can see her eyes again. 

He just wishes they didn’t look so sad.

“No, JJ I’m not gonna leave it.I am committed.I am committed to protecting the environment.”Her eyes look poignant and wet.JJ knows it’s not from the rain. “Nothing is ever going to change unless we do something.We’ll just end up doing the same shit over and nothing ever changes and everything is gonna be fucking ruined.”JJ knows she’s not talking about the environment.His hair is plastered to his face, the waves are doing their best to knock him off his feet, and he can’t look away from Kiara’s face.“You might be able to just leave it, JJ, but I can’t.”

The thing about JJ is that he knows, okay?

He knows Kiara.Really knows her inside and out.Would be able to recognize her even if he was deaf and blind.Would know her anywhere.And so he knows what she’s afraid of. 

She’s afraid to mess up their friendship.She’s afraid that nothing will be the same. Or that everything will be the same.She’s afraid to fall too deep and not being able to find her way to the surface.Kiara doesn’t know how to do things by half - is always all in 100%.She’s afraid of giving him all of herself, her heart and soul and body, and not receiving the same in return.JJ knows, okay?

He knows because he’s afraid of all the same things.

Kie is his best friend and he loves her.He _loves_ her and he doesn’t want to lose her if things don’t work out.Because he’s a human disaster.He’s got daddy issues and mommy issues and authority issues and about a million different kinds of issues.He’s clingy and messy and broken and he fucks up almost everything good in his life.Sometimes he thinks it’s a miracle he hasn’t scared the Pogues away.He’s desperate to keep them, to keep _Kie_ , even if it’s at a distance.Sure, it hurts, but he can take it.He can suffer through being just her friend if it means he gets to keep her in his life. 

Except it’s not just him that’s hurting anymore.It’s written all over Kie’s face.Her eyes are screaming at him to do something, say something. Screaming _, why are you doing this to us?Don’t you feel it?Don’t you want me too?_

And that thought is unbearable to JJ.The thought that Kiara Carrera, the love of his life, could think for even a moment, even a second, that he doesn’t want her, is unimaginable. 

JJ doesn’t know shit about alternate realities, but he’s positive that there isn’t a universe in existence where he isn’t completely, painfully, pathetically in love with her.

So, yeah, he’s scared of fucking it up.But right now, what scares him more is the look on her face.The haunted, pained look in her face. 

_You might be able to just leave it, JJ, but I can’t._

He can’t leave it either. 

He just can’t.

He trudges through the violent, knee-deep waves and stops right in front of her. She doesn’t back down, too proud or too determined, and their noses barely brush. The rain is loud as it makes contact with the surface of the water. They’re both completely drenched through, JJ in just his in trunks and Kie is her bathing suit top and cutoffs. On a normal day, he’d watch as each and every raindrop trailed down her perfect skin. Today, he can’t look away from her eyes.

He can barely hear her breathing heavily over the sound of the rain, knows she’s nervous, unsure.JJ reaches, traces his fingers along her waist, praying she won’t pull away.

She doesn’t.She blinks her eyes a beat too long, reinforcing her resolve, JJ knows, and tips her chip up at him.Their noses bump.

“I won’t,” JJ says, barely audible amidst the storm, voice raw.He cups her cheek, urging her closer and thanking the universe when she doesn’t pull away.Their lips are so close now, barely a hairsbreadth away.JJ can’t help but press a single, barely-there kiss to her lips. 

It’s over almost before it starts, but when JJ opens his eyes he sees that Kie has slammed hers shut, her lips parted slightly.“I won’t just leave it.”He kisses her again, longer this time.Her lips are wet with the rain.He thinks he might be addicted already.“I’ve got it, Kie,” he says against her lips.Kisses her once, twice, three times in quick succession.“I’ve got you.”

The sound that escapes Kiara’s throat is something akin to a whimper, and this time it’s her that kisses him.Harsh and firm and perfect.JJ grunts when their teeth clack together, but it morphs into a moan when she wraps her arms securely around his neck to bring him closer. 

The wind picks up again and sets every single hair on the back of JJ’s neck on end.The tickle disintegrates immediately when Kiara rakes her fingers through his hair down the back of his neck.He shivers and coaxes her mouth wide with his tongue.She tastes so sweet and her skin is so soft even with the rain and he could die happy.He wants to feel all of her.He has to.

He runs the work-worn pads of his fingers down her spine, exposed so prettily to him thanks for her bathing suit top.He can’t help but grin when she detaches from his lips with a shallow gasp.Immediately, her fingers tighten in his hair and she pulls him back in again. 

JJ bites her lower lip, relishing in her whimper before teasing away the sting with his tongue.Kie pushes in even closer, nearly knocking him off his feet, and JJ can’t help but marvel at the desperate press of her body against his.He can feel every soft curve and raised goosebump, trails a hand from her cheek and down her chest before landing on her hips, squeezing. 

JJ thinks he’d be happy to do nothing else in his life except listen to her make all of her sweet sounds.He coaxes another out of her with the press of his tongue against the roof of her mouth.

The wind kicks up her loose hair, throwing it in a million directions.Kiara pulls away to lave her tongue at the pulse point at his neck.JJ grunts, feels her nip at his collarbone. He cups her neck and forces her chin up.He kisses her cheek, her chin, sucks at the soft spot behind her ear. 

“JJ,” she gasps, either asking or demanding. JJ doesn’t care which, he’ll give her whatever she wants. Always. Whatever she wants. He slants his lips over hers once more. Her wild hair gets caught up in the wind and tangles between their panting lips.JJ growls at the disruption.Despite the spark of frustration bubbling up inside him, his fingers are unbearably gentle as he tucks the offending strands behind her ears. 

“Kie,” he says, unable to take his eyes off her.There are bright blooms of pink high up on her cheeks.Her lip is caught between her teeth and JJ runs his thumb over it, caressing the petal-soft skin free.Her lips are pink and swollen and JJ just wants to kiss her forever.

Kie’s eyes are still closed, so she misses the way a huge bolt of lightning sets the sky on fire.The ensuing boom of thunder makes her jump away though, facing out towards the open ocean.JJ chuckles and wraps his arms firmly around her waist, pulling her back against his chest.“We should go in,” he says, latching onto her rapidly-beating pulse with his lips. 

Kiara leans into him, reaching her arm back to wrap her fingers in his hair.“Help me with this,” she says, turning to press another two, three, four quick kisses to his lips before pulling away. 

JJ can’t help but laugh and shake his head.“Yes ma’am,” he says, reaching grabbing as much floating litter as he can.

When the finally make it into the Chateau, Pope is puttering around in the kitchen while John B sprawls over the pullout scrolling through Instagram and Sarah squeezes water from her hair with a towel.They all appear to have gotten dressed into fresh, dry clothes, and JJ wonders just how long he and Kie were out there.

“There you guys are,” Sarah says brightly.“What took you so-“She trails off with narrowing eyes.She looks back and forth between JJ and Kiara, smirk forming on her lips.JJ knows that his lips are swollen and his hair is a mess.And one look at Kiara and anyone with half a brain would be able to tell what she had been up too.Sarah clears her throat but doesn’t continue her thought, instead opting to start raking her brush through her hair. 

John B looks up from his phone, noticing the sudden silence in the room.He looks between his girlfriend, JJ, and Kie before rolling his eyes and looking back down.Pope pops his head from the kitchen, takes one look at JJ and Kie dripping onto the floor, and says “Y’all are gonna get sick.Go put on some dry clothes.I’m making popcorn.” 

Pope returns to the kitchen and Sarah joins John B on the pullout, propping her chin on his shoulder.JJ pulls on Kie’s hand and leads her to his room.He pulls out two sets of cozy, well-loved sweatpants and sweatshirts, handing Kie one of each.Their fingers brush and Kie smiles.

“Thanks,” she says, biting her swollen lip.“I’ll just go change in the bathroom,” she says, pointing over her shoulder with her thumb. 

JJ nods like an idiot, his voice suddenly caught in his throat.Kie’s mouth quirks to one side to hide her little smile, and she steps away from him, heading for the door.Her hand is on the knob when JJ is finally able to spring into action.It only takes him 3 large, quick steps to reach her.“Kie,” he says, grabbing for her hand.She spins at the briefest contact as if she was just waiting for him to chase after her. 

JJ cups her cheeks in both hands and backs her up against the doorframe, slanting his lips purposefully over hers.They don’t move, really.Kie clutches her dry clothes to her chest and lets herself be kissed.JJ breathes through his nose and smells the saltwater still wet on her skin.After a long, slow moment, he pulls away and leans his forehead against hers.“Hi,” he says.

Kie laughs.“Hi,” she says, tilting her chin up and pressing one final quick kiss to JJ’s lips.“Bye,” she says, fingers gripping the door handle. 

“Bye,” JJ says, letting her slip past.The door closes behind her and JJ immediately presses his head against it, heart racing in his chest.

He can’t help it.His grin practically splits his face in two.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'all thanks again for sticking this out with me. I really hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it. PLEASE tell me your thoughts by leaving a comment. 
> 
> Also, I mentioned this last chapter, but I have thoughts on a sequel?? What are y'all's thoughts on that?
> 
> OKAY LOVE YOU BYEEE THANKS FOR READING 
> 
> Oh, and feel free to come find me on [tumblr](https://usnavisbubbly.tumblr.com/).


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